Father’s Day, such a joyous occasion, families gathering together to celebrate the Patriarchs of their families. Men who have sacrificed themselves for the sake of their children. Men who are exceptionally great heroes in the eyes of their children and even others. This is Father’s Day!

For me father’s day looks different, it’s not full of accolades, celebrations, or even cards. My father’s days until just recent have been filled with silence, no cards, no calls, no nothing. I understand that many men aren’t the model of Fatherhood that is celebrated every year, but it doesn’t mean they sacrificed any less than those who receive all the praise. It doesn’t mean that our children aren’t important to us, or that we Love them any less. Many of our sacrifices go unseen, never spoken of, and never celebrated.

We’ve been called many things, father isn’t usually one of them. We have been called Deadbeat, Bastard, Trifling, and just plain No Good, because we didn’t or don’t have the resources to provide, or a way to get there. We have missed many Birthdays, Holidays, and Games. Now I’m not saying we are victims, because we have some responsibility in our Misery. When we were in the Selfish state of our lives, because we were Addicted to Drugs, or we were seeking someone to Love us in our broken state, that was all us and no one else. But I’m speaking about when we began getting it together, and start asking to spend time with our children and we get answers like, “we already have something planned, their phone is broken, or they Hate you and don’t want anything to do with you!” We often hear, “It took both of us to make this child,” and that is true. But it seems that some women forget that when their emotions are still tied up in the hurt of the Breakup of the relationship. Then the children become Weapons of War, they are used to inflict hurt and pain on the father, because she wants him to feel what she is feeling in her Emotional state.

Please understand that this doesn’t depict every mother, because there are some men that just don’t want the Responsibility of being a father. This war goes on for Decades, because there no place for Forgiveness, Healing, or True Understanding! But in Reality the Only Victims are the Children. They Suffer the Selfishness of their parents! Mothers and Fathers wave a banner displaying the Prideful statement, “I will do anything for my child,” until it has to do with their Ex! Then it becomes I don’t Trust my children around them, or the person they may be with! The Ironic thing is that you trusted them enough to Lay down with them and create a Child!

The real issue is no one took the time to understand the other’s family Dynamics, they fell in love/lust with the Outer shell, and when the Truth became apparent, neither of them understood how to handle the Brokenness of the other.

If you have Fathered a Child/Children, please do everything you can to be a part of their lives! Mothers learn to Forgive and don’t use your Child/Children as a Weapons of War. No one Suffers more than the Child/Children! Children can Learn Forgiveness from their Parents, so teach them!

Again I say this Blog isn’t about All fathers or mothers, it is for those who have been in Battle for so long, they are now passing it down to their children.

And he shall turn the hearts of the father to their children, and the heart of the children to their fathers, lest I come and strike the land with a decree of utter destruction.”

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY!